A liberal blog about important issues, including health, politics and social behaviors.
Friday, January 28, 2011
Am I the only atheist who doesn't care if religious people don't want to date me?
Look.. if someone didn't want to date black people because they were black or a bi person because they were bi that's one thing.. you're discriminating based on how the person was born. If you refuse to date a black person even if you love everything else about them, love their personality and find them attractive.. then you're just racist. If you don't want to date someone who has a fundamentally different system of beliefs and ethics which is incredibly important to you.. then of course you want to find someone with similar views! Some people don't mind- they don't tend to be the activist sort... but if you don't want to date a bigot because their ethics are fundamentally different from yours then that's fine! (of course the bigot is usually the religious person not the atheist, but it's just for making a point). If being for women's rights is incredibly important to you then who would blame you for not dating a misogynist? If animal rights if your thing then who could blame you for not dating a hunter? All of these things go in the other direction too.. i'm sure a hunter wouldn't want to date an animal rights activist.. that's completely understandable. Relationships are hard enough without having to deal with a person's beliefs which cause you emotional turmoil. I don't get the big deal or why atheists tend to complain that religious people won't date them... deep seated personality conflicts probably means it wouldn't work out anyway. Find someone more apathetic if you are as well or find someone with whom you mesh on basic ethics and beliefs.
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I think the important distinction comes at the reason for not dating an atheist (or for an atheist not dating a religious person).
Wanting someone who shares your views is obvious and I have no problem with that and I can applaud it. However, some religious people will forbid themselves dating an atheist, even if they aren't very religious and it plays absolutely no active roles in their life, and if the atheist potential partner is not active about their lack of faith. If the religious, or lack of it, plays no practical role in their life, but they take them off the table as a possible dating option based simply on religion, I think that's a problem and they're hurting themselves as much as the other person.
But, for people where their religion or their atheism is a part of their life, then I understand making it a qualifier for dating candidates.
im an atheist catholic, if that makes any sense,even though i dont believe in a god.i would not date a person from a different religious background,even if i did not believe in my own religious background..Tim
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I Don't Really Care If Religious People Don't Want To Date Me. And I Wouldn't Care If The Person I Date Is Religious There Is Something Called Tolerance. I Can Respect What There Doing But I Wouldn't Take Part In It.
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